First, Ask Yourself: “What kind of atmosphere do I want to encourage in my marriage?”
What kind of place do you and your husband want to come back to—to recoup together from the world? You don’t need fancy furniture or perfectly arranged decor to create that.
I know our marriage is stronger because we have established this sacred space just for us in our home.
When we need to work on marriage issues, our master bedroom is a neutral zone where we drop our differences and choose to ask for forgiveness.
When we need to discover solutions to parenting issues, we come here to shed tears and encourage each other.
When we want to connect intimately, our master bedroom is a comfortable place where we can bare our souls as well as our bodies.
And when we need a place to be transparent and honest before God, this is our refuge—a place where our weary hearts can drop their burdens and find deep soul replenishment.
Every single couple needs a place like this.
Second, include items that remind you of the best parts of your marriage
My husband and I designed our master bedroom to be a place that reminds us of where we’ve been as a couple, and where we want to go.
Yes, on our walls you’ll find a few inspirational quotes about real love—the imperfect-yet-grace-filled,1 Corinthians 13 type of love we want to give each other.
But most of all, there are photos—lots of them—of us together.
Personalized photo art like this isn’t just for newlyweds or for an old wedding picture (although they are great for both of those).
These type of photos are so important for all couples. SO important.
And even more so for those of us who are firmly planted somewhere between the newlywed and “golden” years of marriage, in the height of the tumultuous at-home parenting years.
In fact, last fall when we took family pictures, we made it a point to take more romantic, whimsical “couple photos” like these.
I was so happy with how this image turned out that this 24″ x 18″ personalized photo art (known as the “Brushed” wall art design from Minted.com) is now proudly displayed on a floor easel easily visible from all corners of the room.
We’ve been married for over 15 years now and I wanted photos like this of us together—photos that captured the joy that’s at the heart of our family and our marriage. Why should these type of romantic, beautiful photos only be for newlyweds? I thought.
I wanted these images to become works of art themselves—thoughtful, classic glimpses of the beauty possible in marriage that would inspire us to give each other our best. And I knew that a simple picture frame couldn't capture that.
I found so many beautiful personalized photo art designs like these on Minted.com. I was blown away at all the different options (and photo frames) available. These were high-quality, unique styles unlike any I’d seen anywhere else!
Many of the designs offer gold foil, like this 8 x 10 image called “Frosted” from Minted's Foil-Stamped Photo Art Collection.
I love knowing that Minted’s personalized photo art designs are uniquely created by artists from all over the globe. Each design comes with a brief description about the artist, making it that much more special.
Photos make up the heart of our master bedroom retreat, setting the tone for who my husband and I want to be as a couple.
As I’m brushing my teeth, changing my clothes or winding down for the night, these memories of times past remind me that a happy marriage is built on everyday choices.
I may be rushing around with a mind swirling with to-do lists, but when I enter our master bedroom, I’m surrounded by images of the couple that I want us to be and that helps me to slow down, to speak in a more loving tone and to choose my words with wisdom and grace.
Psst… which designs would you pick? Check out Minted.com's beautiful collection here.
Is everyday life perfect like the photos? Of course not.
But these pictures and mementos remind me that, yes, life is better together than it is apart.
They remind me that I need to keep the little things in my marriage that drive me crazy as little things and look at the bigger perspective.
6 Other Important Aspects of a Restful Master Bedroom Retreat
1) Simple things like candles and nice lighting can help bring peace and rest. We have a dimmer switch that is nice for creating romance and encouraging intimacy.
2) We have a lock on the door and use it often (and not just for that).
There are times when our restful master bedroom retreat must turn into a private conference center (away from the distractions of life and the needs of our four kids).
It’s our place to confess our sins to each other, to share our fears with God, and to strategize about how to make all the puzzle pieces of our too-busy lives work.
It’s a place to close out the distractions and to remember that we are a couple first.
3) We don’t make the bed everyday, but we’ve made it an unspoken rule between us that the room is kept fairly picked up in order to keep clutter at bay.
4) My husband and I do our best to watch our words here. It’s not that we hide deep emotions while in our master bedroom (on the contrary, we feel this is the place to share them). However, we choose our words with wisdom and extra caution here in order to keep the overall tone of our master bedroom as a healing zone instead of a war zone.
5) While it's not necessary, it's nice to have a few simple things in the room that bring comfort and coziness. We have a set of chairs with big fluffy throw blankets that we sometimes like to cuddle with while we're hanging out.
6) We've also considered how to handle the issue of electronic media in the bedroom. Is it alright to have a television? How about the use of phones or tablets? Every couple must make their own decisions about what is and is not permitted in this special place, and there are no “correct” choices here except for what will be most comfortable and restful for the both of you.
There really are no rules about what you “should” or “shouldn’t” have in your master bedroom marriage retreat. Make your master bedroom a place that creates an atmosphere that encourages marital growth and replenishment!
Establish your master bedroom to be a sacred, restful space and you’ll find that it will become a beautiful part of your marriage too!
Enjoy creating this beautiful space together!
P.S. Is your marriage going through a rocky patch right now? It's OK–no one's marriage is perfect and we all go through difficult seasons.
Even if things in your marriage are challenging right now, I'd still highly encourage you to consider creating a master bedroom haven. Hang pictures of the two of you together during happier times (even if your current feelings about your spouse don't reflect those images) and let those pictures remind you of where you want to go in your marriage.
Obviously marital issues can be extremely complicated and painful (and I'm in no way saying this is a blanket quick-fix for every couple). However, creating this safe, peaceful zone may be the first step toward a commitment of new healing and hope for your marriage.
FTC Disclosure: I received products from Minted.com and was compensated for my time. However, all opinions stated here are 100 percent mine, and I was not required to post a positive review.
About Alicia Michelle
Alicia Michelle is a certified NeuroCoach™, Bible teacher, speaker and host of The Christian Mindset Coach Podcast and You Tube Show. More importantly, she’s a lover of Jesus, a wife of 21 years to her best friend, and mom of four amazing kids ages 19 to 10. Alicia struggled with overthinking, negative thoughts and “being enough” for most of her adult life until God radically transformed her heart after a life-threatening medical crisis. Now through her signature courses and coaching programs she loves equipping women with practical, scientific and biblically-based mindset tools to help them overcome negative thought patterns and discover more confident, joyful lives in Christ. Listen to her on the podcast or on You Tube; download free workshop trainings at VibrantChristianLiving.com; and connect on Facebook and Instagram.
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